Aftermath/Reflection - Day 1

It had been a pretty fresh morning for me, probably because I hadn't over practiced and burnt the midnight oil. This year, my strategy was not to stress myself too much by practicing last minute, as it proved to be a failure in the past two year that I have competed.I didn't bother to practice more in the morning and true enough, It did help me in many ways. At the very least I wasn't as nervous as I should be in a competition day. Heck, It didn't even felt like I had an event on that day, except i knew i had one.

While waiting for a bus, I wondered what the day would be like. Good? Bad? Still, I didn't feel any pressure nor stress. As I took various means of transport to reach my destination, The Cineleisure, I thought many things unrelated to yo-yoing, perhaps to keep me less frightened or anxious for the day ahead. It worked well and i was quite happy.

I reached the venue quite early, however, there were more people that were earlier than me. I saw the mass exodus of people throwing round metallic objects vigorously trying to practice and get used to the stage because everyone knew it would be a whole different world when it is their turn to perform. With many pairs of eyes staring at you, with the music being played so loudly that the bass could scare you. The atmosphere was completely different.

I saw that. The people whose faces were filled with fear of screwing up completely. Probably because they have not been having a good day practicing on the stage. With accidents and incidents ruining everything altogether, I think that it is not surprising to witness this. I for once, have been trying my best not to practice at that day, knowing that practicing would make me end up becoming fearful of what was to come.

In the end, i succumbed to much temptation of wanting to practice, although I had practiced, It wasn't as nerve wrecking as the previous years because this time i was able to hit what i planned on stage. I did many unnecessary jargon like washing my face and hand, adjusting my string length to precision and of course trying to keep myself cool. It wasn't what I would usually do but i guess it is what almost all of us do when we are panicking. I went up on stage, and as the music started, I tried my best to execute what i have planned but to no avail. In an act of despair, I tried to think of impromptu tricks to do during the extra time i had left. It wasn't appeasing as I did tricks that did not appease the judges.

In the end, I finished my performance with a disappointing look on my face. I didn't perform well. Sadness filled my heart. My mood had suddenly swung into that of a depressed person. I lost hope. It seemed like all my effort is going down the drain. An impromptu event made many people go up the stage. It seemed like the best thing to do to cool down myself, after all that disappointment i got in myself. In the end, I felt happy all over again as i got myself up on the stage with many familiar and unfamiliar yo-yo players. Then, finally, the results are out. It wasn't what I was looking forward to. As Hans, the head judge of the contest announced the qualifiers, I cupped my face with my hands and almost cried. Then, at the announcement of the last qualifier, as though they purposely announced in on sequence, I was called.

I did it.